Blank


No, that’s the title, dude, okay? As in having a blank mind, not a blank title page. Oh whatever, you know what I mean.

I give up, but not without trying. Seriously! I’m finally raising my white flag, just for today, though. But I will save the white flag because I may need it tomorrow again. Lol! I tried to write, focus, but ain’t working up here. My brain is completely stuck. The term braindead is completely making sense.

It’s Friday afternoon. The clock says 4:36 p.m., and there are only two people in the clinic. So damn quiet here. The other clinician is working on finishing with his client, and I’m accompanied by pandora.com. I really need to get outta here, but I’m just waiting for the other person to finish his job so I can close the clinic. But what do you do when every single muscle of your body is aching to get out of this place? *sigh*

It’s been a long week, had my dissertation defense on Tuesday. It went well, too well actually. I guess I handled it well, but you wouldn’t have guessed so if you saw me that morning prior to the defense. Hah! *shaking head* I learned many new things about myself and anxiety on that day. I thought anxiety was at least a good friend of mine. Nope, anxiety was completely taking over me that morning. Can’t say I like that feeling again. Anyway, I’m exhausted. Not physically, but mentally. Can’t concentrate, can’t focus, can’t control my impulses.

It’s beautiful outside too, so beautiful that for once I’m glad my office doesn’t have any window. I can’t imagine how much more difficult it would have been if I have to stare constantly at the beautiful day outside from inside this cage. Plenty to be analyzed from the choice of word “cage” 🙂

One more month, that’s all I can say. One more month and I can break free! Done. In the mean time, there are still a lot that I have to do. All the little pieces still need to be completed. The major humps are all done (THANK YOU, GOD!!), but unfortunately, I think I’m running out of gas, or at least about to run out of gas.

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